Listen, so I’m working right!?!  Minding my own business when Negative Nancy comes strolling in the door, and by the look on her face, my happy existence is about to come CRASHING DOWN!  She’s notorious for spreading gossip, killing dreams, and otherwise single handedly destroying people vibes!

Needless to say I prayed that she would just go away!  **DON’T JUDGE ME, LOL** Unfortunately, I had to bear my cross from time to time and listen to what she had to say.  In the middle of her conversation it dawned on me.  She only kills what I allow her to kill.  She could come in here day in and day out and I could ignore every nasty, negative, destructive word that comes out of her mouth.  I’m letting her kill my V.I.B.E.  As I sit and really analyze what she says, I’m coming to understand she’s not happy about her life.  How many times do we throw the light of condemnation and negativity onto others because we can’t handle the flaws in our own life?  Better they be in the spotlight, right?  And even more so, how many times do we allow others negativity to skew our view of our own dreams? 

Now Nancy has me taking stock of my life.  With all of the wonderful and trying things going on in my life, why am I so susceptible to her commentary?  Sometimes we listen and conform to the thoughts, opinions, and fears of others while hashing out our own dreams.  In the case that we have a slight question of if we should be pursuing that particular dream, Negative Nancy finds an opening to the most wonderful playground EVER!  In other cases, she speaks death in the places that we are absolutely confidence!  We can walk into a room so sure in what we started pursuing, and by the time the conversation is over we are walking around scared and second guessing the very thing we know we are purposed to do! 

So to Nancy, and all the others like her in the world, I say… DON’T KILL MY V.I.B.E.!  Now you may ask “what exactly is your V.I.B.E.?”  Well I’ll be happy to elaborate.   I’m a Vibrant and Intellectual young woman that is beyond Blessed to have the Existence that I am currently enjoying!  I’ve not reached every goal that I’m going after, but I’m working towards them!  As I am, so are you!  You have too much life and knowledge to allow someone the opportunity to make you question yourself!  You are blessed and are here on this earth to effect change!  So what are you waiting on!?! Stop allowing the Negative Nancy’s of the world to throw dirt on your dream, or shade your sun!  You’ve got too much to achieve to allow the simple words of another person to drag your dream into the ground.  Stand up, dust the dirt off yourself and your dream, and get moving!  Someone is waiting on you to be an example.  Another person is waiting on your dream to help them achieve their dreams.

The next time you run in to Negative Nancy, hug her/him, find the silver lining in the situation, and keep pushing through with the positive V.I.B.E. you walked in with!  And if that doesn't work blow them a kiss and scream "Don't Kill My V.I.B.E.!" 

"How long?"
"Not long?"

If you've ever grown up in the country, you've heard this statement.  I heard it many times, just as my dad or my cousins decided they were going to take me out in a game of dominoes!  SMH...  they showed NO MERCY! 

Anywhoo!  I learned quickly that while playing with these guys, time was of the essence.  As I've gotten older, I've learned that time is even MORE precious and a valuable commodity that once lost can not be restored.  So what happens when you find yourself in the following situation:

So you met person A and they seemed to be amazing.  You felt like it could be something great, only to find out they have baggage.  Now I hear you already, "everyone has baggage from their past!"  That's true, HOWEVER, this person had current/present baggage they chose not to release.  Although they were wonderful in every aspect, this baggage gravely effects the way you all communicated and related.  So the question comes to mind, "How long?  How long do you wait on this wonderful person to release this current baggage with someone else, and move forward with you?"  This is a difficult question, and before you get on your soapbox, please know that just "leaving the relationship alone" is a difficult notion.  Let's be realistic.  You have probably invested time, money, and energy in this person, as well as invited them into your circle of friends, and depending on the level of intimacy, your family.   How exactly do you just let that go? 

I found myself on the listening end of this question and I quickly gave the answer of "leave them" before I truly thought about the mindset of the person on the other end of the line.  There are emotions and feelings tied into some of these relationships depending on the time and ties built.  So when advising a person on an issue such as this, how long should a person stand in the wings of the stage waiting for the leading lady/man in their life to decide they are ready to take the stage?  After working as a stage manager one thing I know is that timing is EVERYTHING.  One missed cue can collapse a show.  So with that I return to my initial question....

"How long?"

Well the answer to that age old question truly depends, or does it? 
I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts, questions, and advice on it all!