"How long?"
"Not long?"
If you've ever grown up in the country, you've heard this statement. I heard it many times, just as my dad or my cousins decided they were going to take me out in a game of dominoes! SMH... they showed NO MERCY!
"Not long?"
If you've ever grown up in the country, you've heard this statement. I heard it many times, just as my dad or my cousins decided they were going to take me out in a game of dominoes! SMH... they showed NO MERCY!
Anywhoo! I learned quickly that while playing with these guys, time was of the essence. As I've gotten older, I've learned that time is even MORE precious and a valuable commodity that once lost can not be restored. So what happens when you find yourself in the following situation:
So you met person A and they seemed to be amazing. You felt like it could be something great, only to find out they have baggage. Now I hear you already, "everyone has baggage from their past!" That's true, HOWEVER, this person had current/present baggage they chose not to release. Although they were wonderful in every aspect, this baggage gravely effects the way you all communicated and related. So the question comes to mind, "How long? How long do you wait on this wonderful person to release this current baggage with someone else, and move forward with you?" This is a difficult question, and before you get on your soapbox, please know that just "leaving the relationship alone" is a difficult notion. Let's be realistic. You have probably invested time, money, and energy in this person, as well as invited them into your circle of friends, and depending on the level of intimacy, your family. How exactly do you just let that go?
I found myself on the listening end of this question and I quickly gave the answer of "leave them" before I truly thought about the mindset of the person on the other end of the line. There are emotions and feelings tied into some of these relationships depending on the time and ties built. So when advising a person on an issue such as this, how long should a person stand in the wings of the stage waiting for the leading lady/man in their life to decide they are ready to take the stage? After working as a stage manager one thing I know is that timing is EVERYTHING. One missed cue can collapse a show. So with that I return to my initial question....
"How long?"
Well the answer to that age old question truly depends, or does it?
I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts, questions, and advice on it all!
So you met person A and they seemed to be amazing. You felt like it could be something great, only to find out they have baggage. Now I hear you already, "everyone has baggage from their past!" That's true, HOWEVER, this person had current/present baggage they chose not to release. Although they were wonderful in every aspect, this baggage gravely effects the way you all communicated and related. So the question comes to mind, "How long? How long do you wait on this wonderful person to release this current baggage with someone else, and move forward with you?" This is a difficult question, and before you get on your soapbox, please know that just "leaving the relationship alone" is a difficult notion. Let's be realistic. You have probably invested time, money, and energy in this person, as well as invited them into your circle of friends, and depending on the level of intimacy, your family. How exactly do you just let that go?
I found myself on the listening end of this question and I quickly gave the answer of "leave them" before I truly thought about the mindset of the person on the other end of the line. There are emotions and feelings tied into some of these relationships depending on the time and ties built. So when advising a person on an issue such as this, how long should a person stand in the wings of the stage waiting for the leading lady/man in their life to decide they are ready to take the stage? After working as a stage manager one thing I know is that timing is EVERYTHING. One missed cue can collapse a show. So with that I return to my initial question....
"How long?"
Well the answer to that age old question truly depends, or does it?
I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts, questions, and advice on it all!
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